I want to want the good things, the things God wants for me.

But instead I want things that I know are destined to not last or not work out.

So what do I do?

Do I say okay and do what seems like the right thing to do even if I'm not happy?  Do I fake it until I make it?

Or do I not fake anything?  Do I just keep going and keep praying that one day God will make the spinach taste like ice cream (yay for inspiration quotes from my dad!)? 

Maybe, even though I choose a difficult road to follow, that road is exactly the road I am supposed to take.  Maybe the challenges I face are there to help me learn about myself and to help me grow.  Maybe I'm not a terrible person because I'm not perfect the first time.

Maybe it's okay to make mistakes.

I just on't want to hurt anyone.

5 Charactersitics of a Dysfunctional Team- #3 is the fear of conflict.

I fear conflict.  I don't want to hurt anyone.  But maybe we are both growing.  Quit being so selfish, Andrea!  Maybe I'm not the only one growing and learning from decisions I make that affect others.

"I think right now your low self-esteem is just good common sense!" -Spanglish

Have a magical day!

Why do I call some people my friends?

I had been sent home from work since they accidentally cancelled my trainer class and forgot to tell me.  So I went to my friend's house for a Superbowl party. 

I was there for 15 minutes.

In that time...I was made fun of by everyone for my boots ( i love my new shoes!)...a really sweet girl at work was made fun of by everyone for being bigger...i was made fun of for not being in school this semester 9a little bit of a touchy subject for me...a point of humiliation if you will)...and a friend of mine was the subject of many a jokes.

Not the best day ever.

Sometimes a girl just needs to be in a bad mood- ya know?  I don't want any sympathy or pity...i just want to be mad!  and the person who dotes on me and tries to fix me is my worst enemy at the time! 

JUST LET ME BE MAD!!!

If you are afraid I'll turn bitter if you let me bad mad...you're wrong!  I'll turn bitter if you don't just let me get mad every once in a while!  AHHHHHH!!!!

I think that I just don't want people to count on me right now.  I don't want anyone to expect anything of me.  I will do things because I want to.  I don't want to b tied into anything...

Is that bad?

Have a magical day!

Currently Watching The Bourne Supremacy (Widescreen Edition) By Matt Damon, Franka Potente, Brian Cox, Julia Stiles, Joan Allen see related

Thanks for keeping me and my family in your prayers guys!  My dad took my brother to the ER that night and they ran CAT scans and a bunch of other tests.  By 5:30AM they decided he was alright to go home.  His knee is in a soft cast until the swelling goes down and they can get a better look at it.  He has two black eyes.  But he's gonna be alright.

I officially quit College Republicans the other day.  I just don't have time!  I'm working 30+ hours a week and need to start looking for a second job.  Plus I'm gonna take a Spanish class with my dad this semester at the community college.  Should be a lot of fun!  And hey!  Maybe sometime I could take a semester abroad.  Or maybe just a vacation with some friends!  Whatever will get me to visit another country I am good with!

I saw Chicago last night at the Pantages.  I think I just don't like the show.  I love the movie- but not the play.  It is very simple.  Simple costumes.  Simple set.  I can definately respect the work the actors put into it and the style- its just not my favorite.  It made me think of my Flashback show.  The theatre I will be in is as big as the Pantages and the stage is just as big also.  I can't believe I am going to sing/dance/act on that stage!  It may not be for long, only 16 minutes, but it is still going to be amazing!  =)

I think I need to go to bed now.  If I get up nice and early I can get a pedicure and do my hair before having lunch at the Blue Bayou and goingto my first trainer meeting!  Happy times!  Good night!

Have a magical evening!

I just got home from Flashback rehearsal.

My brother had been drinking (he's 18) at a pizza place up the street.  Hewas talking to friends in the parking lot.  Some guys came out and said something to them.  My bro said some smart ass (excuse my french) comment back.  They took it as a challenge.  They slugged him hard in the face.  Oneof his friends tried to help and they hit him too.  They kept hitting him.  My brother is pretty beat up...we'r trying to make sure he doesnt have a concussion or any internal bleeding.  His friend is in the hospital.

I on't know what to do!  Help!  We could all really use your prayers right now!  Thank you all!  I don't know what to do!  =(